A man speaks about feminism — and we’re listening. Why? Because he’s not talking about women, he’s talking to men. And because he finally explains what others don’t even want to see.
A feminist with a beard. And backbone.
Patrick van Lier is tall, white, straight, cis — in other words, he ticks all the boxes still linked to power, influence, and patriarchy. The kind of guy many women wouldn’t want to encounter alone on the street at night.
But Patrick is different. He sees the system — and takes a stand against it. Loudly. Intelligently. Uncomfortably. Under the name Feministo Explains, he’s cleaning up on Instagram — calling out bullshit, clichés, male complacency. And yes, himself.
„I’m the prototype of the one who benefits. But I don’t want to be that anymore.“
First came love. Then the realization.
Patrick didn’t discover feminism through books — but through people. First, there was his mother: single mom, three kids, three jobs — a role model of strength and resilience. Later, his wife, who confronted him with feminist topics, again and again — until he couldn’t look away anymore. The rest? A story of courage, change, and integrity.
Today, Patrick is the father of three children, including a daughter, and he’s writing a book — for men. A level-guide for anyone thinking: Feminism? That’s not for me. Yes, it is. Especially for you.
“I didn’t suddenly understand feminism. I just eventually stopped looking away.”
When men talk about menopause — with no women present
Patrick speaks about the things that usually stay hidden at the men’s table. Sexist jokes at the bar. Dumb remarks about female colleagues. One moment Patrick still can’t believe: A TV panel on menopause. With seven men. And no women.
Sounds like a sketch from a feminism parody? Sadly, it was real — and aired on the French news channel CNews in 2023.
A group of so-called experts, including a gynecologist and conservative TV personalities, discussed menopause — and how exhausting it is for men and children. Actual quote:
„These women are constantly opening the windows, even though it’s freezing outside.“
To Patrick, it’s not just bizarre, but symptomatic: “That’s mansplaining at panel level. Men explaining things they’ll never experience — without realizing how absurd it is.”
He uses exactly these kinds of examples to take a public stand — and, most importantly, to show other men how to do better.
Instagram instead of ivory tower
What started as a small account has become a growing movement: Thousands of followers, 20% of them men. Every day, he receives messages from men saying, “Thank you, I never saw it that way.” And from women saying, “Finally someone who gets it.”
Of course, there’s hate too. Men calling him a traitor. Women being skeptical. And that’s okay. Trust has to be earned. Patrick knows that. He keeps going. Every day.
Conviction over heroics — what really drives Patrick
Patrick isn’t looking for attention, applause, or moral superiority. He wants impact. Change. And men who realize they’re part of a system — and take responsibility to help shape it. Not out of guilt or shame, but out of conviction.
“I’m not giving up privileges. I’m enabling others to have them.” — A sentence that captures what it’s really about.
And what does this have to do with you?
Everything. Because gender equality isn’t a women’s issue. It’s a human issue. And we need men like Patrick to stand up, speak out, listen, learn — and above all: help shape the change.
We at Belle&Yell believe: Real change happens when more men like Patrick speak up, get loud, listen, learn with us — and most of all: join in shaping the future.
Feminism isn’t the opposite of masculinity. It’s its evolution.
„I’m not giving up privileges. I’m making them possible for others.“
A line that captures what it’s really about.
